Hi! My name is Josh, this me blog.

The dance of pleasing the social media algorithims of the world’s biggest companies, whilst being beat to death by strangers with their comments displeased me so now I’m here.

I wish I were the kind of person who could just live without broadcasting. But there’s an animal inside me — right down in the marrow — that keeps asking ‘can you see me?’ and silence has never once soothed it.

  • Im going to start a book club where we talk about all of the books we bought at that cute bookstore in DC but haven't touched since.

  • Business idea: a shopping centre without annoying people. We'll call it Westfield Heights.

  • "I found you on Reddit" - probably the best thing I've ever heard a groom say

  • Life update: I can't figure out how to get an NYC domain name registered in my name. That's all. Move along now.

  • Who do you think Charles Manson's fiancé's choices for snog and avoid were?

  • In the next 5-10 years I imagine that we'll be fundraising to send selfie sticks to kids that have to selfie with their own arms.

  • "Until I started reading your blog, the entire saga [of getting married] seemed more like a punishment than a party" - Michelle :D

  • My web hosting has been down for 46min & counting. If u can guess exactly how many mins it will be down for you'll win a sad face from me.

  • TV channel idea: 24/7 rolling coverage of toddlers dancing to pop songs filmed by their mothers. This could be amazing.

  • Whoa there, tiny dancer, whooaa. Too close.

  • Who are my web app developers on Twitter?

  • Is it Tuesday?

  • Just spent the whole shower trying to figure out which day it is. Which is probably the best way to describe self-employment.

  • Can't believe they're playing Christmas music on eBay already.

  • I feel like there needs to be a feature comedy film about all of the stupid things Microsoft has done. Starring Jen Anniston & Seinfeld.

  • "Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the year." - Spanish Proverb

  • I'm not procrastinating. I'm searching the internet for just the right folder icon to put my course documents in before I start. Gosh.

  • 2yrs ago a bunch of people though @benabrahammusic could record a sweet album, so we threw money into his @Pozible. Today we listen & enjoy.

  • In other news, I think "F* Yeah Gay Weddings is the coolest name for a wedding blog @FYgayweddings.

  • Just had an a great chat with the #G20's florist - so many cool, and classified, stories!

  • Can't wait until the year 2060 where we'll all be listening to Classic Dubstop AM radio stations.

  • Can anyone recommend an iPhone app that allows you do crop images to actual pixel sizes, like 100x100px?

  • PM Abbott could have guaranteed a long rein in Australia if he opened the #G20 with a serious warning on the dangers of drop bears.

  • I’m no @karlstefanovic but I wear the same suit a lot as well #celebrantlyf

  • Having heard the leader of the USA speak, on the same day and the leader of Australia speak, I literally can’t #G20

  • Pretty much the only thing Australia can do now is just wave a white flag and hand Obama the keys to Kirribilli #G20

  • I’m pretty sure @BarackObama just held a public intervention with @TonyAbbottMHR #G20

  • Ummm, did @BarackObama just shirtfront Putin? #G20

  • Listening to Obama speak makes you wish Australia could be lead by a statesman, not an embarrassment #G20

  • What time does Captain Planet arrive for the #G20?

  • Life would be easier if just had the voice control button replaced with a ‘Call Britt’ button.

  • I’ve got a state of the art voice control system in my car and the only thing I do is argue with it about trying to call Brittany.

  • Pen emergency #celebrantlife

  • Finally @KimKardashian and @TonyAbbottMHR are working together on a project: #BreakTheInternet

  • "Everybody's trying to leave their mark on the world. That's why there's graffiti and babies." - Kristen Schaal

  • Walked past the Brisbane Marriott today, Obama’s sleeping there Saturday night. The White House looked less secure last week! #G20

  • Just received an email that had "Sent from Surface Pro" at the bottom of it. Is this a new joke that I missed out on whilst in the states?

  • The best thing about #TheTalkShow is where @gruber tells @siracusa “let’s wrap up on this” and Overcast says there’s 40 minutes left.

  • Is anyone doing a #RedFooFacts Twitter joke thing yet? Anyone? @RedFoo?

  • Make an offer to @FakeAshPunch

  • Post holiday blues: Trying to empty my "Business to be attended to" email folder. Only matched by the joy that is my "For Quickbooks" folder

  • Is this what they mean when they say "all in a day's work"?

  • Fly from LA to Sydney, Sydney to Brisbane, drive Brisbane to Gold Coast, perform two ceremonies, and stay for the second's reception.

  • Looking forward to getting home so I can pin bad wireless internet service on @Telstra instead of free airport and cafe WiFi.

  • America, you've been good to us. A little too good with this unscheduled extra day in LA. See you in 21 hours. Australia!

  • The title of the next, next #StarWars movie has been released: Star Wars: The Force Is Grabbing A Late Brunch Today.

  • So LA’s pretty cool

  • Went past the Women's Museum in Washington DC. Seems a bit pointless, women don't ever forget anything. They need a men's museum.

  • How much kale do I need to eat to offset a pumpkin spice latte from Starbucks? Asking for a friend.

  • I’m havjng far too much fun in DC.