Hi! My name is Josh, this me blog.

The dance of pleasing the social media algorithims of the world’s biggest companies, whilst being beat to death by strangers with their comments displeased me so now I’m here.

I wish I were the kind of person who could just live without broadcasting. But there’s an animal inside me — right down in the marrow — that keeps asking ‘can you see me?’ and silence has never once soothed it.

  • Next time I fly @united I'm taking a can of @pepsi to give to the staff

  • Instead of getting free nuts onboard a @United flight, you simply are nuts for boarding a @United flight.

  • Join the @united frequent fighters club today to start earning points now!

  • "Sir, you're actually three feelings over for your fare, it looks like you're still holding on to that time we beat you up."

  • After this United incident are airlines going to have to start offering emotional baggage allowances?

  • Have you considered ditching the seating plan? Place a sign saying 'Sit where you'd like"

  • If you think about it, we're all Kendall Jenner and our memes are cans of Pepsi

  • "Love is better than no love, though it can hurt so much." - Iris Murdoch

  • What's your favourite thing about the person you're marrying?

  • À partir d'aujourd'hui, le 1/4/17, toutes mes cérémonies de mariage seront en français pour augmenter la sensualité de mes mariages.

  • As of today, 1/4/17, all of my marriage ceremonies will be in French to increase the sexiness of my weddings.

  • Crazy/awesome idea: Sunrise ceremony, brunch party. Sunset drinks with just the two of you.

  • I'm open to blog post ideas - anything you'd like help with that I could write about?

  • Choosing music for your wedding tip: Good music acts as a guide to good living. Let your wedding music be the soundtrack to your marriage.

  • Where did you meet your bride/groom/husband/wife?

  • "Nothing awakens us to the reality of life so much as true love" - Vincent Van Gogh

  • Table next to me is a job interview, grade nine girl interviewing for a job at the cafe ... I remember being way more scared than this girl

  • Bonus: I know the safety demo word for word now

  • Not feeling very woke // flight 3/3 for today, take me home to the Gold Coast, QF

  • If you've got some news you need to release, you've got about 10 minutes to get that press release drafted 9pm NYC and the world collapses

  • Mere minutes until the world get's to see Trump's tax returns and I'm pretty sure Twitter's gearing up the fail-whale

  • Confession: I have a playlist called 'Great song' that only has Dave Dobbyn's Slice of Heaven on it. I'm cultured like that.

  • Step 1: Put effort into your marriage. Step 2: Enjoy your marriage. Step 3: Go to step 1.

  • I think @GlennontheGC mistook me as a talent scout for one of a weekend TV show showcasing local hotspots. Also, Mudgeeraba isn't terrible.

  • Don't be surprised when you see me admitted to rehab for my inbox zero addiction.

  • A kid three rows up just screamed "I need a nap!!" We all dude little bro, we all do. SYD ✈️ OOL

  • Voicemail message: "Hi, it's James, I'm out doing all the things you're dreaming about doing so leave a message"

    #humansofmyinbox

  • Dropbox begins alienating pro users, but renaming Pro to Plus. I trust this means at sometime I need to hire staff or change to @BoxHQ?

  • I'm with @PaulineHansonOz, hearing only @shakira on the radio would suck.

  • Still alive #88evil

  • Hey @gravityforms and @stripe - when will we be able to #ApplePay with the two of you?

  • Wanna be unpopular? So does my podcast guest today 🤓 Episode 5: Holt me, thrill me, kill me, meet the Unpopular Director of Connections

  • Megan's pumped! #JointAddress

  • This would be a great time to drop a press release you wanted no-one to read #jointsessions

  • Airpods in, angry face read, let's #jointsession

  • I really like the idea of all of the world leaders having a group chat where they all just share gifs and memes

  • "Behind every complaint there is a deep personal longing" - John Gottman. What is your spouse longing for from you?

  • Pro Marriage Tip: Perfection is impossible. Don't aim for perfection in your marriage or home. Instead, aim for progress.

  • Things I should see while in Wellington, NZ?

  • 10kg of carry on luggage with a 7kg limit

    OOL✈️WEL

    hashtag gangstatravla hashtag jetstarlyf

  • Apparently we're ending all jokes with the words 'sad' now. Sad!

  • Did you choose your wedding photographer based on price or photos?

  • Pro Marriage Tip: Never stop being curious about your spouse. There's always more for you to learn about them.

  • Trying to find flights to Bali for a wedding & my schedule is super tight

  • Is there a tool to see which flights are arriving into an airport days/months in advance? Like a reverse flight tool?

  • "You sponsored by Apple or something?" asks the barista, delivering a solid burn to the visiting marriage celebrant

  • Every time I see an A380 I can't help thinking what a big sexy frikkin plane it is.

  • QantasLink Dash 8 that is supposed to take me from Sydney to Albury broke down on the runway ... good thing I'm flying a day early :/

  • Srsly?

  • Not sure where I'm going, pissed that no provider can take responsibility for a $600 unwarranted/extra charge because of a group failure